Assignment 4 _ Unwelcome News Letter (Inclass writing) (1)
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University of Victoria *
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BMBA100
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Communications
Date
Feb 20, 2024
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docx
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THE INDIRECT APPROACH
STEP-BY-STEP ANALYSIS AND PLANNING GUIDE
When delivering negative or unwelcome information, use the indirect approach and pay attention to tact,
diplomacy, and the proper tone. PART ONE: Analyzing your message and audience.
What is the purpose of this message? To inform the customer of some health advises
What is my main message, expressed in one sentence?
The top priorities in Lagoon Lodge are customers' health and safety.
Who is the intended reader? The reader will be a parent with kids, most probably their age from 28 to 45.
What do I know about the intended reader? What will they care about in this situation?
People who care for their children want to spend their vacation happy in a nice place full of activities.
Who else might see the message? Do I need to adjust the message because of these secondary readers? The message will be delivered by mail to the book maker and maybe this person will read it with his or her partner
What is my job or role in this situation? How will the message affect me and my organization?
My goal here is to illustrate the lake's health issue, present other options for visitors, and make sure not to lose any booking.
(continued on next page)
What channel should I use to deliver the message?
We will use the paper mail channel.
What is the scope of the message?
The scope of my letter should be to communicate share information, idea, and solutions.
What would be the best tone for this message?
My message should be projecting a professional and positive image of the resort. I’ll use the passive tone, but I should write the positive solutions. My language must be professional and polite; I must explain the reason behind the negative news.
What questions might my reader have about the situation?
I will expect the readers to ask: if we can give them a discount, what is the level of the danger of swimming in the lake, and what kind of activities their children can do or what is Lagoon Lodge can offer for their kids.
(proceed to Part 2 below)
PART TWO: Planning the indirect approach.
The indirect approach follows the steps below. Use this planning document to gather your first thoughts and ideas for each section.
•
Choose a neutral subject line. (Or decide that no subject line is needed.)
Our costumer’s health is our priorities
Neutral opening (buffer). What statement would my reader agree with? Being our customer is valuable to Lagoon Lodge; we have always enjoyed serving you and serving your lovers; since 2007, we have been working hard to provide our guests with the best services.
Explanation. What background information or reasonable explanation will prepare my reader for the unwelcome main message?
Health is an essential factor. Also, the resort has other facilities that your family will use it.
Statement of the main message. How can I convey the message without upsetting or alienating my reader? I will convey the message by Keeping my messages simple, short, and transparent. Also, I will maintain trust and care.
Positive Ending. How can I convey my concern for the reader and our relationship?
First, I will choose the right time to send the message. Second, I will show them how much Lagoon Lodge cares and will do its best to make them happy and satisfied. Lastly, my message will be kind, and
my approach will be gentle.
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PART THREE: Checking the first draft.
\Once you’ve written a first draft, check that you have met the needs of each section.
•
Choose a neutral subject line. (Or decide that no subject line is needed.)
Will my subject line convince my audience to start reading the message?
Does my subject line avoid revealing the bad news?
Neutral opening (buffer). Is my opening brief and related to the subject?
Am I careful not to indicate that negative news is to come?
Do I avoid getting my reader’s hopes up by beginning too positively? Explanation. Does my explanation contain the right amount of detail—enough, but not too much?
Will the reader accept the logic of my explanation?
Have I shown how my reader might benefit, if possible?
Do I avoid blaming company policy or other people in my organization?
Do I avoid apologetic words such as “unfortunately” and “regretfully”?
Do I avoid using negative words such as “can’t” or “won’t”?
Statement of the main message. Do I focus on the positive?
Is the bad news brief and contained?
Do I deemphasize the bad news by placing it between other sentences and moving on quickly?
Have I offered alternatives or compromises, if available?
Do I avoid offending the reader with my words, tone, and emotion?
Have I checked if I could clearly imply the main message without stating it?
Positive Ending. Do I avoid mentioning the negative message again?
Do I avoid apologizing?
Do I end with a sincere and upbeat tone?
Have I kept the reader’s good will toward me and my organization?
Lagoon Lodge
Lagoon Lodge located at 321 Loch Ness Way, Ladysmith, B.C., V9X 3T2.
1
st
of March 2022
Amit Marsh
10 Mountain Street, Suite D,
Victoria, B.C., V6T 1U1.
Dear Mr. Marsh,
It is a pleasure to have you as a valuable member of Langoon Loage. We’re excited to see you and your family in our resort again, and we hope you will have a wonderful experience while you are here. Our hotel will be ready to serve during your visit, and as usual, we will be more than happy to help you during your stay.
I want to inform you that we found that swimming in the lake near the resort is a bit dangerous, and some swimmers have reported "swimmer's itch caused by tiny worm-like parasites. So on behalf of Langoon Loage we recommend you not swim in the lake. This announcement has been made to protect our customers from any things might harm them or disrupt their vacation. It is your call if you want to swim in the lake or not, but we highly recommend you not to do that. If you need more information about the effects of swimmers and how itch can be minimized, please visit this link https://www.healthlinkbc.ca/healthlinkbc-files/swimmers-itch
However, our duty is to make your stay enjoyable, and we want to make sure that you will have an excellent time in our resort. Therefore, Langoon Loage will offer other attractions for visitors, including pools and a playground. Our guests can safely enjoy other lake activities that keep them out
of the water recreational activities in the area, such as a new scenic trail across a railway bridge.
Again, we apologize for any inconveniences we might cause in this latter; we believe that our customer's
health always came first due to this necessary health information.
All customers may cancel with a full
refund up to 7 days before their visit. After that time, they lose their deposit. We have done our best to minimize the impacts on your vacation, and if you have any concerns or questions, please don't hesitate to contact me.