Peer Reviews
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School
American Public University *
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Course
260
Subject
Communications
Date
Nov 24, 2024
Type
docx
Pages
2
Uploaded by anhp0911
Peer Reviews
Aaron Luna,
The introduction was very strong and set the tone for the rest of the paper. I think you did a great
job providing detail and using Hanke’s quotes to strengthen your points. I think you added just
enough quotes so that it’s not overwhelming, but adds to your paper. The research question was
very easily identified in the first paragraph, but I didn’t see any thesis statement or anything
detailing your stance on the topic. It’s a very worthwhile question and one that is prevalent in our
society today because we rely on technology and social media. The body of the essay had plenty
of different studies and data from scholars to substantiate the claims made that social media
negatively affects interpersonal skills. The author stayed on topic and did a great job only
including important information. Aaron did a great job with sourcing and making sure to not only
qualify the source but give credit to each source that was used. The quotes used were strong and
not overdone. They did a good job adding to the argument rather than distract or take away from
the argument. There was some specialist language used, but Aaron did a great job explaining and
creating understanding and not just putting unknown terms. Aaron only used a few specialist
words which is great because it didn’t require as much explanation and was easily understood.
Aaron did a great job making sure that the entire paper flowed smoothly, and utilized only
relevant information and sources that presented concrete evidence rather than just filler
information. I would like to have seen a little more on exactly what the negative effects were
because throughout the only thing we get is that it leads to decreased interpersonal skills. What
kind of skills are decreased? What are some alternatives that you suggest to help combat the
problems? Overall, you did a great job on the paper Aaron, it was easy to follow, had great
information and you did a good job allowing the reader to see your point of view, but make their
judgements.
Hello Jacob,
The introduction was great, it was to the point and had some good material. I can gather from the
introduction that your research question is somewhere along the lines of, Will brick-and-mortar
retail stores exist in the future? Or something along those lines. I didn’t see where you directly
stated the question for people to read. It might make your introduction much easier if you
directly stated it so people understand what you’re speaking about. The paper itself was very
focused and driving home the point that retail stores need to adapt and overcome if they’re going
to continue to exist and thrive. The quotes used are well placed and over information that adds to
the overall points being made and doesn’t just clutter the paper up. The use of the picture is great
and helps add information to the paper, but I feel as though maybe an appendix where you
reference that is better so that it doesn’t clutter up the paper. Jacob did a good job introducing
different ideas like ARSAA and giving great definitions as well as examples of what it is and
how it’s used. The specialized language didn’t seem overwhelming because Jacob did a great job
explaining and putting it into normal terms for everyone reading. I didn’t have any trouble
reading the paper at all, it flowed smoothly and was very clear from the start. I don’t think there
is much I would change except for maybe putting the research question somewhere in there
followed by a thesis. This will allow us reading to know exactly what your answering, the
research question, and what your stance on the topic is without having to guess or read the entire
paper before coming to our conclusion. Besides those couple of things, I think you laid a solid
foundation, built up from that and added plenty of information and great sources to substantiate,
and had a great conclusion. One of the biggest criteria for the paper was clarity throughout,
which you did an exceptional job. You had great transitions and provided data that helped build
your paper up. The source information was synthesized very well and you even took your time to
break down specifics so that it was easier to understand and follow. Great job overall.
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