Reflection Journal Week 3

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School

Iowa State University *

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438

Subject

Philosophy

Date

Oct 30, 2023

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docx

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Uploaded by DrMorningTrout7

Congruence means that what you show others on the outside matches what you are feeling on the inside. Sometimes it is difficult to detect when you are in congruence with your feelings (Kennedy, Lecture 9/1/20). One thing that I believe my ideal self and true self have in common is my respect for others. I want to be the type of person that can easily go up to a new person and respect them no matter what their beliefs are about certain things. I want to be the kid in the classroom that does not mess around when the teacher is talking and listen quietly. I want to be able to respect everyone around me by thinking of them before I act. I have always been the type of kid to smile and introduce myself to new people and ask them about their day. I was always chosen to show around the new kid at school and become their first friendly face. Both teachers and parents have told both myself and my parents about how I am an extremely respectful student both to my teachers and my peers, which gives me evidence that I have achieved my goal. I feel like there is great congruence with my ideal self and true self when it comes to respecting others. Another great quality that I want myself to achieve is being coachable. This is an odd quality to want to have, but I have grown up playing many sports, and something each and every one of my coaches value is having a player that listens and respects the coach at all times. I have always wanted to be the player that younger kids look up to just because they have a great relationship with their coach. I feel like I achieved that goal all through junior high and high school. My high school coach, which watched me through my entire career of softball, told my parents and other coaches that I am one of the best kids to coach. I was not the greatest athlete when I first started playing sports, but because I was coachable it gave me opportunities to become even greater. When getting compliments and seeing what others see in you, it makes you want to keep being that person. It grows your self-esteem and makes you want to be even greater. Even though I wish to be a fully functioning person, that is a very difficult role to achieve. A fully functioning person is someone that has complete congruence among the ideal self, self-image, and true self (Alexander, 2010, p. 39). Identifying in-congruence is difficult, but I would have to say that my ideal self has a lot of self-respect, and my true self lacks that. I have always wanted to be a great powerful woman that does great things, looks amazing, and has their whole life put together. When I look at myself right now, I feel quite the opposite. There are days I get up and look in the mirror and I feel like having a great day, but that is sadly a very rare occasion. Most times I feel so disappointed in not only how I look but how I feel. I am always beating up on myself about everything. After reading the textbook and reading about how important self-love is, I have realized that I do not have that at all. On the outside it may seem like I am a great confident woman, but on the inside, there really is no confidence at all. This has made my self-esteem get really low lately. My self-concept is just as bad. Even though I have been having really low self-esteem and self-concept, I also have been having more motivation to fix that. I want to create as much congruence as possible between the two. For me, it is difficult to do something about my imperfections because it is hard to admit that they are true, but recognizing that it is normal for everyone to have in-congruence in their lives has made it easier for me to accept it and move forwards with it.

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