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Salt Lake Community College *
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1010
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Communications
Date
Feb 20, 2024
Type
docx
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3
Uploaded by MagistrateKouprey17467
Gokhale 1
Alejandra Copyak
Stephen Reiher
Comm 1010
10/03/23
Short paper 2: Seek first to understand, then to be understood
1.As you listened, how accurate was your first understanding of the speaker’s statements?
Yesterday, I made the decision to have a conversation with my uncle. We are the same age and had a disagreement a few weeks ago which resulted in us not talking. I wanted to work things out, so I suggested we sit down and talk it out. During our conversation, I allowed my uncle to speak first and share his perspective on the situation. While his understanding of the disagreement was different from mine, I listened attentively and refrained from interrupting him. 2.How did your understanding of the speaker’s position change after you used paraphrasing and questioning?
In our recent discussion, I found my cousin to be remarkably at ease, confidently responding to all my inquiries without any reluctance. Ordinarily, he is not open to my suggestions or accommodating with his responses, however, when I provided him the space to communicate without interruption, it displayed a degree of consideration. By attentively listening and avoiding
any disruption, I garnered his appreciation and recognition for my maturity.
Gokhale 2
3.Did you find that the gap between your position and that of your partner narrowed at all as the conversation went on?
As I sat down with my cousin to discuss the issues we had, I came to the realization that the problem was not about the differences in our opinions but rather the lack of communication. I recognized that I had a tendency to interrupt others when they were speaking, and as a result, I didn't always take the time to hear their point of view. I realized that this stemmed from the environment I grew up in, where conversations were often dominated by one person. I made a conscious effort to become a better listener, taking the time to understand my cousin's perspective and allowing them to express themselves fully. It was a breakthrough moment for us as we were able to identify the root cause of the issue within minutes and resolve it amicably.
‘ 4.How did you feel at the end of your conversation? How did this feeling compare to your usual emotional state after discussing controversial or disagreeable topics with others
As soon as the words left my mouth, I could feel a weight lifted off my shoulders. It was a genuine conversation that I had with my cousin, who happens to be my age and with whom I share a close relationship. This assignment came as a timely reminder that we needed to communicate more often. I couldn't help but wonder how long it would have taken me to reach out to my cousin if it weren't for this task. Nevertheless, I am grateful for the opportunity to have discussed our issues, as it has helped me to work on my emotional state. I can already sense a slow but steady improvement, and I am looking forward to continuing our conversations.
Gokhale 3
5.How might your life change (with family, friends, associates etc) if you used more sincere listening, paraphrasing and questioning – instead of trying to rebut the other person or win an
argument?
Having a meaningful conversation with someone and gaining a deeper understanding of their perspective is more valuable than always trying to prove that you are right. Personally, I believe that my cousin and I grew closer after discussing our disagreements. It was a truly rewarding experience. I strongly believe that improving one's communication skills can lead to stronger friendships and healthier relationships.
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