PSYC3520_Assessment4

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Herzing University *

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3520

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Psychology

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Dec 6, 2023

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1 Unrequited Love, Moral Awareness, and Fair-Mindedness: A Case Study In this case study, Susan and Mark meet at a coffee shop where Mark invites Susan to a party he and his friend are hosting. Susan, seeking to rekindle her social life, accepts the invitation. At the party, Mark begins to misinterpret Susan’s social cues, causing him to perceive a deeper connection between them. Despite her appreciation for the invite, Susan wants to avoid sending the wrong signals due to their recent acquaintance. As the night progresses, she enjoys herself but remains cautious in her interactions. When the party ends, she thanks Mark for the enjoyable evening, connects with him on Facebook, and heads home. However, after a few days, Susan logs onto Facebook to find that Mark had publically shared multiple posts expressing his love and admiration for her. It becomes evident to Susan that Mark has misconstrued her friendliness as a romantic interest. Recognizing the need to clarify their relationship, Susan sets boundaries for their future interactions and publicly unfriends Mark on Facebook, opting for an honest approach despite the potential discomfort it may cause. Unrequited love refers to a type of romantic attraction or affection where one person has deep and intense feelings of love and desire for another person, but those feelings are not reciprocated by the other person (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). In other words, it is a situation in which one person expresses passionate feelings towards someone who does not feel the same way in return. Unrequited love often involves longing, yearning, and emotional pain as the person with unrequited feelings struggles unreciprocated affection (Baumeister & Bushman, 2020). Research Support Research Summary Baumeister et al. (1993) explored the emotional experiences associated with unrequited love, on both the part of the person experiencing the attraction and the person rejecting it. The study found that individuals experiencing unrequited love felt a mix of positive and intensely negative emotions, while their rejecters exhibited more consistently negative emotions (Baumeister, 1993). Rejecters saw would-be lovers as delusional and unreasonable, finding their pursuing efforts to be intrusive and bothersome (Baumeister, 1993). Baumeister (1993) found that individuals experiencing unrequited love often believed that the attraction was mutual, but viewed rejecters as inconsistent in their feelings. It was also noted that rejecters often felt guilt despite considering themselves ethically innocent (Baumeister, 1993). Hu et al. (2022) examined how people's imagined interactions and romantic beliefs relate to unrequited love. They surveyed 225 college students and found that stronger unrequited love was linked to having more idealized, unrealistic romantic beliefs (Hu et al., 2022). The study also found that individuals who frequently imagined interactions with their romantic interest felt stronger unrequited love, concluding that frequency of imagined romantic interactions served as a significant contributing factor to the development of this phenomenon (Hu et al., 2022). Additionally, men were found to experience stronger unrequited love than women (Hu et al.,

2 2022). Greve et al. (2021) aimed to explore the relationship between unrequited love and healthy coping mechanisms, namely humor. The research successfully replicated previous findings by showing that humor as a coping mechanism moderates the link between unrequited love and psychological well-being (Greve et al., 2021). The study found that individuals with higher humor scores demonstrated a weaker connection to the psychological burden of unrequited love. In addition, they displayed a more positive overall quality of life (Greve et al., 2021). The observed enhancements in well-being were particularly noticeable in maintaining self-esteem, which is often undermined by unrequited love (Greve at al., 2021). Research Interpretation B aumeister (1993) demonstrated the complex socioemotional dynamic within unrequited love. The fact that pursuers exhibited both positive and negative feelings regarding the situation, while rejecters exhibited more consistently negative emotions, points to the hopefulness and a sense of excitement on the part of the pursuer ( B aumeister, 1993). This research serves as a testament to the far-reaching emotional implications surrounding unrequited love on both the pursuer and the rejecter, indicating that complex factors are at play. Unreciprocated love clearly involves intricate emotional interplay, indicating a need for sensitivity and empathy. Baumeister (1993) also found that pursuers tended to view the relationship as mutual, further complicating the dynamics of unrequited love. These findings indicate a need for open communication between the pursuer and the rejecter. Hu et al. (2022) delved into the connections between people's imagined interactions and unrequited love. This research provides valuable insights into the factors contributing to the complex experience of unrequited love, finding that frequent imagined interactions strongly fueled the intensity of unrequited love and its associated emotions (Hu et al., 2022). The gender disparity within the findings is noteworthy, with men exhibiting a greater intensity of unrequited love than women, demonstrating the intricate interplay of emotional experiences in the realm of unrequited love and suggesting potential variations in how individuals of different genders

3 process and navigate such situations. The findings of Greve et al. (2021) suggest that the use of healthy coping mechanisms, particularly humor, plays a significant role in reducing the emotional burden associated with unrequited love. These results align with earlier research on various challenges, highlighting humor's role in mitigating their impact (Greve et al., 2021). The research found that individuals who did not employ healthy coping mechanisms such as humor experienced a lower quality of life, emphasizing the detrimental effect that unrequited love can have on one’s well-being (Greve et al., 2021). Equipped with the knowledge of the positive impact of healthy coping mechanisms on the emotional challenges of unrequited love, individuals can proactively seek effective strategies to mitigate its negative impact. Application of Unrequited Love Several indicators of unrequited love are present throughout the case study. Although Susan, driven by her longing for social interaction, initially accepted Mark’s invitation, it is clear from the case study that she considers him a friend rather than a romantic interest. At the party, Mark misinterprets every look from Susan as an indication of her attraction to him, demonstrating the potential beginnings of unrequited love. In cases of unrequited love, it is common for the pursuer to feel a false sense of mutual attraction, underscoring the significance of his misinterpretation of her social cues (Baumeister, 1993). Although Susan does not lead him on, and rather thanks him for the invitation, connects with him on Facebook, and takes a cab home, Mark continues to misinterpret Susan’s feelings as mutual, which is a common hallmark of unrequited love (Baumeister, 1993). The day after the party, when Susan logs onto Facebook, she is confronted with many posts written by Mark about his love and affection for her, indicating Mark’s growing infatuation. According to Hu et al. (2022), the frequency of which one imagines interactions with their crush is directly related to the strength of their unrequited love. As Mark was professing his love for Susan on Facebook daily, one can assume Mark frequently imagined a romantic connection between himself and Susan, further fueling his feelings. Susan has no romantic feelings for Mark, and therefore, she quickly realizes that Mark's perception of their relationship differs from hers, underscoring the mismatch in their emotional involvement. Susan decides she must clarify their relationship to Mark, but she is concerned about his feelings as she acknowledges

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4 that unrequited love is a challenging emotional experience that can have profound adverse effects on one’s mental health ( B aumeister, 1993). To support his emotional well-being and mental health, Mark can benefit from adopting strategies that promote emotional resilience and well-being, as research has shown the importance of utilizing healthy coping mechanisms to successfully navigate the emotional distress caused by unrequited love (Greve et al., 2021). Ethical Reasoning Application Ethical Concept Moral awareness refers to the capacity to recognize and value the ethical dimensions of a individual’s decision (The University of Texas at Austin, n.d.). Moral awareness is considered to be the first step towards ethical behavior (The University of Texas at Austin, n.d.). Without moral awareness, individuals might find it challenging to grasp the ethical implications of their actions and may inadvertently make unethical decisions. This fundamental awareness plays a crucial role in guiding ethical behavior and decision-making. Supportive Evidence Moral awareness is displayed by Susan’s approach to handling the situation with Mark. Early in the case study, Susan's hesitation about not wanting to give Mark the wrong impression indicates her moral awareness. She is aware of the potential consequences of her actions and is trying to navigate the situation in an ethical manner. She wants to avoid leading Mark on or creating false expectations, demonstrating her consideration for his feelings and her desire to handle the situation with integrity. Susan again demonstrates moral awareness by immediately recognizing the ethical dimension of the situation when she realizes that Mark has misinterpreted her friendliness. As misunderstandings between parties are a frequent characteristic of unrequited love (Baumeister, 1993), Susan's decision to promptly respond to the situation by clarifying their relationship shows that she is morally aware of the possible implications should she let the situation progress. Additionally, Susan expresses that clarifying her relationship with Mark is “the right thing to do,” showing that she is mindful of what constitutes an ethical and unethical decision (The University of Texas at Austin, n.d.). Critical Thinking Application Critical Thinking Issue Fair-mindedness is the capacity to impartially consider diverse perspectives, devoid of personal or group biases, and to apply intellectual standards universally (Capella University, n.d.). It entails acknowledging the importance of treating all viewpoints equitably and in good faith. Fair-minded individuals strive for ethical responsibility in their thinking, demonstrating openness to differing opinions. Fair-mindedness is exemplified by genuinely considering opposing viewpoints, even from individuals with whom they may not readily connect (Capella University, n.d.). Fair-mindedness is one of the eight intellectual traits essential for critical thinking, outlined within the Paul-Elder Critical Thinking Framework (University of Louisville,

5 n.d.) Supportive Evidence Susan demonstrates fair-mindedness in her thought process throughout the case study, as she clearly displays her ability and willingness to consider others’ perspectives. Susan acknowledges that although it may be painful for Mike to hear the truth about her feelings for him, she knows she must clarify their relationship. By recognizing that addressing this issue may be a painful experience for Mark, Susan shows empathy. In addition, Susan crafts her reply to Mark’s obsessive Facebook posts sensitively, demonstrating her consideration of his feelings. Despite being in an uncomfortable situation herself, Susan still takes into account the feelings and emotions of Mark, and decides to handle the situation honestly and responsibly. This clearly demonstrates fair-mindedness, a foundational aspect to critical thinking (University of Louisville, n.d.). References Baumeister, R. F., & Bushman, B. J. (2021). Social psychology and human nature (5th ed.). Cengage Limited. https://capella.vitalsource.com/books/9780357713754 . Baumeister, R. F., Wotman, S. R., & Stillwell, A. M. (1993). Unrequited love: On heartbreak, anger, guilt, scriptlessness, and humiliation. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 64 (3), 377–394. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.64.3.377 . Capella University. (n.d). Fair-mindedness . https://campus.capella.edu/critical-

6 thinking/qualities-of-the-thinker/traits-of-the-mind/fair-mindedness . Greve, W., Hauser, J., & Rühs, F. (2021). Humorous Coping With Unrequited Love: Is Perspective Change Important? Frontiers in Psychology, 12. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.653900 . Hu, M., Zhang, B., Shen, Y., Guo, J., & Wang, S. (2022). The Roles of Romantic Beliefs and Imagined Interaction in Unrequited Love. Imagination, Cognition and Personality, 42 (2), 145–166. https://doi.org/10.1177/02762366221093921 . The University of Texas at Austin. (n.d.). Being your best self, part 1: Moral awareness . Ethics Unwrapped. https://ethicsunwrapped.utexas.edu/video/best-self-part-1-moral- awareness . University of Louisville. (n.d). Paul-Elder Critical Thinking Framework . https://louisville.edu/ideastoaction/about/criticalthinking/framework .

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