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Feb 20, 2024

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Leila Chung Mui Cheung 1 Modern Day Slavery: An Examination of Political and Economic Practices and their Effects on Workers and Citizens 1a) Title is clear and precise INTRODUCTION 1) Slavery, to this day, still exists. Although rebellions and movements happened and laws and acts passed, acts of slavery, whilst subtle, are still committed. 1b) Interesting opening line, captures the reader’s attention. Briefly, slavery is the state in which individuals find themselves when they are the property of someone they have to obey. Slaves have little to no individual rights and are forced to do tedious tasks, in most cases, for long time periods, despite their health and environment. For long, slavery served as basis for building countries. Slaves were forced to produce goods or to do farm work, which generated profit, which then enabled people to do trades and eventually exports. Eventually, these actions were deemed immoral and were abolished. You can also add more detail by providing an example of an Act that was used to abolish those actions. However these practices were not completely eradicated: they instead became more present in today’s society as they are more subtle than before. Indeed, many people work and live in conditions that are similar, if not the same, to old time slavery, and strangely, most of these people are people of color and women, reflecting the racist and sexist mentalities related to slavery. This situation goes against the values of the present day society, which advocates for equality and justice, thus creating a gap between social reality and social ideals. Many people are kept at a low socio-economic status, without many opportunities to advance up the social hierarchy (Social discipline) . Workers, employed for cheap, in developing and underdeveloped countries have no other choice but to work in mediocre conditions and for inhumanly long work hours in order to survive (Economic discipline) . Slavery patterns are also seen with the prison industry, who utilizes race based methods in order to generate more profits.
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 2 On another hand, the hidden industry for human trafficking also utilises the deprivation of rights and forced labour on kidnapped people, especially women. In other words, slavery might have been abolished, but there are still individuals who are intentionally kept at low socio-economics levels, which closely resemble (resembles) the status of slaves, by big and powerful entities, [ thus perpetuating the perpetuation of slavery in the present time ] . 1c) Maybe rephrase this part by diversifying the words. Otherwise, thesis statement is adequately introduced. 2a) Clear thesis, easy to understand after having read about the social and economic disciplines. 2b) Thesis is sufficiently focused on the fact that slavery is still present nowadays even though it has been officially abolished decades ago. Overall, great introduction; thesis is adequate, details are provided on the disciplines you’ll be using and the essay title gives a clear image of what the text will be talking about.
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 3 BODY PARAGRAPHS 2) Firstly, industries employ workers cheaply to maximize their profits. (Topic sentence #1) Topic sentence is clear and properly reflects the content of the paragraph. Many of the big names in the market often search for a labor force that does not cost much, in order to have more people produce more products at a higher rate. (Economic discipline is introduced, on a meso level of analysis, by mentioning how slavery functions in an economic market. 1a) Discipline is introduced by explaining the mechanism behind the employment of slaves in a market. 1b) The thesis being that slavery still exists covertly, the discipline here is developed into describing slavery’s existence in today’s world from an economic point-of-view [functioning of the market]) Labor makes up 25% to 50% of the costs of production 1 , which can be expensive, especially if the workers are highly skilled and educated. Moreover, [ in the market, consumers demand for the lowest retail price. As a result, if companies want to appeal more to the consumers, they have to reduce their prices, which will help them sell more or in other words, to achieve maximum profit. 2 To achieve this, reducing the cost of production is a solution. Companies seek this cut in cost in the labor price. They employ more people for less, which will help them produce more to resell to a cheaper price. By using slavery, they are able to “afford a virtual nil cost of labor”. 3 ] Theory (I think) Most of the big names brands owned by a majority of the population employ millions of individuals and unethically force them to work. For instance, the clothing brands Old Navy and H&M have millions of women working in their 1 Siddharth, Kara. (2017). Modern Slavery . New York: Columbia University Press, 32. 2 Siddharth, Kara. (2017). Modern Slavery. New York: Columbia University Press, 32. 3 (Siddharth, 32)
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MODERN DAY SLAVERY 4 factories in Cambodia. 4 The workers reported to often experience medical issues regarding their stay in the factories and said that they only made around 80$ per month. 3) When it comes to employing cheap labor, migrants, mostly people of color, are the ones in question. (Topic Sentence #2) Introducing a statistic here could significantly reinforce the claim (topic sentence). Most of the most famous companies establish their factories in developing countries to employ the workers for cheap or employ migrants in developed countries. (Social discipline is introduced, on a macro level of analysis, by explaining what group of people [migrants] are most affected by slavery. 1a) Discipline is integrated by identifying migrants and people of color as the victims of slavery. 1b) The thesis being that slavery still exists covertly, the discipline here is developed into describing slavery’s existence in today’s world from a social point-of-view [most affected group of people]) In other words, slavery is mainly practiced by developed countries, or for companies originating from a developed country. The agricultural sector in California for example, “is heavily reliant on low- wage migrant labor”. 5 Generating billions of dollars on production (e.g. 5.2$ billions for grapes production), the sector employs immigrants from across the border. 6 In this case, Siddharth Kara, an expert and author on contemporary slavery, qualifies this as a labor trafficking type of slavery. According to his research, people are brought across the border to work in plantations, and in most cases, without government authorization. These people are promised money and citizenship, or in other words, opportunities for their family and themselves. 7 When they arrive on the work field, they are taken under the control of the owner of the farm, which means that the owner has absolute power over the workers’ food, house, wages…etc. To increase the control, the farm owners and the labor contractors who brought them place fees on the workers 4 VICE News. (2014, October 15). From Sex Worker to Seamstress: The High Cost of Cheap Clothes [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnXhB1XtL2o 5 (Siddharth, 79) 6 (Siddharth, 78) 7 (Siddharth, 80)
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 5 for their house, clothes…etc. The workers are then forced to work more and pay their fees in fear of being deported. 8 In addition, the workers have very limited access to the outside, which means that they cannot make regular phone calls, cannot go out of the fields…unless they pay for it. 9 4) The minorities, in other words migrants and people of color, are coerced into being the stepping ground of a functioning society. (Topic Sentence #3) Clear topic sentence, but a little unconcise since it could be formulated into more details (so that the reader knows where the text is going). (Social discipline once again referred to, on a macro level of analysis, by explaining how migrants are the likely victims of slavery throughout the world. 1a) Discipline is integrated by stating the fact that migrants and people of color are the ones that are affected by slavery. 1b) The thesis being that slavery still exists covertly, the discipline here is developed into describing slavery’s existence in today’s world from a social point-of-view [migrants’ and people of color’s coercion to accomplish hard tasks]) It is not only in the US that migrants are heavily relied on to keep the economy growing. In England, it was found that London’s economy was dependent on low-paid migrant labor. 10 Migrants tend to jump on any work opportunity, because of the lack of choices. 11 Since they restart their life anew, it is difficult for them to find jobs. However, in the low end of the labor market, there are tons of low-paid jobs available. 12 Migrants tend to understand the price of a comfortable life, so they are more prone to work harder and for a longer duration. They are often employed in the sectors of construction, cleaning, care, food and sex. 13 Their desire for a better life makes it easier to exploit them, by making them work harder. All the work that is undesired by those who live comfortably is given to the migrants. The jobs the 8 (Siddharth, 82-89) 9 (Siddharth, 82-89) 10 Dwyer, P., Hodkinson, S., Lewis, H & Waite, L. (2015). Hyper-precarious lives:Migrants, work and forcedlabour in the Global North. Sage Pub , 39 (5), 580-600. Retrieved from https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0309132514548303 11 Dwyer, P., Hodkinson, S., Lewis, H & Waite, L. (2015). Hyper-precarious lives:Migrants, work and forcedlabour in the Global North. Sage Pub, 39(5), 580-600. Retrieved from https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0309132514548303 12 (Dwyer, Hodkinson, Lewis, Waite) 13 (Dwyer, Hodkinson, Lewis, Waite)
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 6 migrants take on are often essential for the development of society. They are the little jobs that keep a society clean and in order. 2a) Good amount of empirical research integrated in paper to support claims. 2b) A moderate variety of references were used in the paper. 3 references used out of 8. 2c) Some sources were used frequently, such as Siddharth’s Modern Slavery . 2d) All body paragraphs were described adequately and contained a good number of varied sources in each of them. OVERALL WRITING 1a) Good paragraph structuring, appropriate use of transition words from paragraph to paragraph. 1b) Only one grammar mistake: resemble , resembles (End of introduction paragraph). 1c) The ideas flow in a logical manner and advance the thesis by providing some statistical evidence and concrete details. 2) MAJOR RECOMMENDATIONS Clear and reflective topic sentences, but as I mentioned, the third one is a little too brief (give the topic sentence a more directed/specific angle) Paragraphs contain clear and strong arguments, but statistics can reinforce them even more Bibliography Bales, K. & Soodalter, R. (2009).  The Slave Next Door . California: University of California Press.
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MODERN DAY SLAVERY 7 Clarke-Ritter, A.E. (2015). Continuity vs. Discontinuity: The Issue of Race and Forced Labor After Emancipation in the American South. University Honors Theses . Retrieved from https://pdxscholar.library.pdx.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi? article=1232&context=honorstheses Dwyer, P., Hodkinson, S., Lewis, H & Waite, L. (2015). Hyper-precarious lives:Migrants, work and forcedlabour in the Global North. Sage Pub , 39 (5), 580-600. Retrieved from https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/0309132514548303 Fischman, K. (2017). Adrift in the sea: The impact of the business supply chain transparency on trafficking and slavery act of 2015 on forced labor in the Thai fishing industry. Indiana Journal of Global Legal Studies, 24 (1), 227-252. Retrieved from https://proquest- crc.proxy.ccsr.qc.ca/docview/1932055226?accountid=44391 Hammad, N. (2019). Shackled to Economic Appeal: How Prison Labor Facilitates Modern Slavery While Perpetuating Poverty in Black Communities. Retrieved from https://racism.org/articles/law-and-justice/criminal-justice-and-racism/137-prision- industrial-complex-and-mass-incarceration/7861-shackled-to-economic-appeal Pereira, S. (2018). Mass Incarceration: Slavery Renamed.  Themis: Research Journal of Justice Studies and ForensicScience 6 (3), 1-15. doi: https://scholarworks.sjsu.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1060&context=themis Siddharth, Kara. (2017).  Modern Slavery . New York: Columbia University Press. VICE News. (2014, October 15). From Sex Worker to Seamstress: The High Cost of Cheap Clothes [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnXhB1XtL2o 2e) Appropriate referencing was used in the paper, APA format respected. 2f) Appropriate referencing was used in the bibliography, APA format respected.
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 8 Peer Review Instructions (5%) Name Sepanta S. Hosseini The Essay Draft I am reviewing belongs to Leila Chung-Mui-Cheung You have been assigned to a peer to give a much feedback on the draft as possible. The following questions can be used to provide a critique of your assigned peer’s paper. DIRECTIONS It is suggested that you first read through the paper and then begin the critique with the second reading. Clearly show on your peer’s paper where you have identified the items outlined below (i.e. mark up the paper in a colored font). First, number each paragraph Refer to specific paragraphs in the paper when answering the following questions. Provide feedback for all of the following items within the Draft you have received (clearly label your answers within the Draft using the numbering below, using colored font and/or highlighting colors and comments) AND complete this document, please. Introduction 1. a. What is the social issue? Modern day slavery b. Is there a hookline/opening line? Is it interesting and does it capture your attention? Explain “Although rebellions and movements happened and laws and acts passed, acts of slavery, whilst subtle, are still committed”. The hook line is interesting and captures the reader’s attention, making him/her wanting to know how slavery is still existing in the present day. c. Was the thesis statement adequately introduced? Explain Yes. It is presented at the end of the introduction and gives a perspective of what the essay is going to be about. 2. a. What is the thesis statement? Is it clear, can you highlight it please and was there enough content introduced before the thesis so you could understand it? “In other words, slavery might have been abolished, but there are still individuals who are intentionally kept at low socio-economics levels, which closely resemble (resembles) the status of slaves, by big and powerful entities, thus perpetuating the perpetuation of slavery in the present time”. The thesis statement is clear, except for the last part (“perpetuating the perpetuation of slavery in the present time”). The thesis is easy to understand after having read about the social and economic disciplines earlier in the introduction. b. Is the thesis clear and sufficiently focused? Thesis is sufficiently focused on the fact that slavery is still present nowadays even though it has been officially abolished decades ago. BODY Paragraphs When reading through the paper, indicate where and how the discipline appears (depending on the organizational framework), as well indicate the level of analysis where it appears. Also indicate where the major theory is discussed if it is.
MODERN DAY SLAVERY 9 1. Depending upon which methods of integration were used in the paper, think about how you will provide feedback for the following (especially for primary organizational structure) a. Identify the methods of integration of the discipline(s) The disciplines were introduced by explaining the mechanism behind the employment of slaves in a market [ECONOMIC], and by identifying migrants and people of color as the main victims of slavery [SOCIAL]. b. Assess how it/they were developed, in relation to the thesis. The thesis being that slavery still exists covertly, the disciplines were developed into describing slavery’s existence in today’s world from an economic point-of-view [functioning of the market] and from a social point-of-view [most affected group of people & coercion to do difficult tasks]. 2. Empirical Research a. Was an adequate amount of empirical research integrated throughout the paper in order to support the claims? Explain. Good amount of empirical research integrated in paper to support claims, such as statistical evidence, theory, details, etc. b. Were a variety of references used in the paper? Explain. A moderate variety of references were used in the paper. 3 references used out of 8. c. Was there an over-reliance on any references? Explain. Some sources were used frequently, such as Siddharth’s Modern Slavery .
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MODERN DAY SLAVERY 10 d. Were any sections under-referenced? All body paragraphs were described adequately and contained a good number of varied sources in each of them. e. Was appropriate APA referencing used in the paper? If not, give examples of where it was not used correctly. Appropriate referencing was used in the paper, APA format respected. f. Was appropriate referencing used in the bibliography? Explain. Appropriate referencing was used in the bibliography, APA format respected. Overall writing 1. a. Comment on the paragraph structure throughout. Were appropriate transitions used from paragraph to paragraph? Explain. Good paragraph structuring, appropriate use of transition words from paragraph to paragraph. b. Was correct grammar used? If not, give examples. Only one grammar mistake: resemble , resembles (End of introduction paragraph). c. Did the ideas flow in a logical manner and advance the thesis each time? If not, give examples. The ideas flow in a logical manner and advance the thesis by providing some statistical evidence and concrete details. 2. Your final summary of the major recommendations (refer to pages, paragraphs and examples) Clear and reflective topic sentences, but as I mentioned, the third one is a little too brief (give the topic sentence a more directed/specific angle). Paragraphs contain clear and strong arguments, but statistics can reinforce them even more Finally, What did you learn about YOUR essay from doing this Peer Review? Explain at least 2 things in detail. By doing this Peer Review, I learned that I should reinforce my arguments more profoundly, since the evidence that I gathered lacks a little bit of “substance”. Also, I learned that I should put as a reference any external source from which I use pieces of information, under the form of footnotes.