Book Review Bringing up Girls
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Liberty University *
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300
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Philosophy
Date
Dec 6, 2023
Type
docx
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5
Uploaded by JudgeHyenaMaster1033
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4-MAT Book Review-
Bringing Up Girls
Julie Gaugler
Liberty University
DMBF300: Child and Adolescent Issues and Helping Strategies
Professor Matthew Hildebrand
September 18, 2023
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Summary
Bringing Up Girls
by James Dobson written in 2014 gives parents guidance of what girls
need to grow up successfully. Boys and girls are so different but the same in being raised to
know God and be emotionally, physically, and spiritually led by their parents. Dobson writes
about how fragile girls are and the stage that the world is in through emotional and harmful
influences. The role models are plentiful but not quality in what they are exposing on the young
population especially girls. The moral values are nowhere to be found in schools or homes that
are not firmly grounded by God. Perfection will not be found on this side of heaven, but a better
job must be done to give girls the best possible outcome.
Self-confidence and self-worth are so important in how girls see themselves and fathers
are very important in their life and how they see themselves through their fathers. Moms are
important in confirmation to their daughters. Girls have a whole different chemical makeup than
boys do and are much more perceptive emotionally. The developmental stages of girls are so
important and happens at a much earlier stage than expected.
Concrete Response
A life episode that changed my entire life and the path it could have been if the world
were perfect. My twin sister and I were born to a lovely couple back in 1974. At that time, I had
a brother who was three. I believe my mother wanted the life of a stay-at-home mom and a
husband and this would make for a picture-perfect life until it didn’t fulfill her emotionally. She
and my father were married for ten years. My sister and I were dropped off at my grandparents’
and there began our life for the next eight years. My mom and dad disappeared off to have lives
without children. As children we conceptually could not understand. I knew I was loved by my
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grandparents and my needs were being met. I had rules and structure and sometimes thought that
my grandparents were overbearing and strict in their practices of parenting. Why can’t we spend
the night at a friend’s house? This was a question that I had asked many times as a young child. I
understand now and still as a parent prefer my children not to have sleepovers. The dangers that
can happen are understandable as an adult. I learned that whether I had my parents or
grandparents it did not matter, I had a moral backing in the way my grandparents shaped my
sister and myself as young girls. I believe without a doubt that the place God put us as young
impressionable girls with out grandparents gave us the best outcome and helped us become the
best wives to our husbands and parents to our children. We are not perfect, but we love Jesus and
have passed that faith to our children.
Reflection
“
It is impossible to overstate the importance of talking in the lives of girls and women.
Though estimates vary, it appears that males use about seven thousand words per day; and
females, twenty thousand” (Dobson, Ch. 4, 2014). This statement is so important for men to
understand. Sometimes girls need the availability to express themselves. Little girls need to be
given time with their fathers and mothers to talk. As teenagers that goes down some because of
girlfriends that are made during this stage of life, but how important these conversations are for
building the moral character needed for them to become wives and moms one day.
Another topic that I would be interested in more information about is the mother-child
attachment theory. I have an adopted child who did not enter our family until she was 18 months
old. She called me mommy right away, but the closeness seemed a little stifled. We are bonded
but probably never as bonded as a biological child might have been. What could have made that
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bond closer I do not know and hope she feels loved every day because that is our goal to build a
Godly character and confidence and a love that can only come from God.
I strongly agree with Dr. Dobson on fathers and their role in a daughter’s life. It is not the
mother’s responsibility to do simply because she is a woman. A father gives a little girl a
resemblance of what the heavenly Father’s role is in her life.
Application
My own personal growth experience will continue with raising our 16-year-old daughter.
I have learned so much in the past five years. She has grown and changed so much. We have
dealt with severe anxiety disorder and depression. She had developed a social phobia that we
have been working through. As an adopted child we were so naive to think that there was no
impact on her beginnings in an orphanage. The trauma was present from the beginning. It didn’t
rear its ugly head till puberty was upon us. She has three loving brothers and parents, but the
connection has had its issues. Our actions have been a good therapy program, discipline, church
family, communication, love, and respect. This book helped me to understand that I am taking
the steps needed to raise a healthy daughter. The problem is the world interferes with this process
because of all the influence that it has on what is being pushed on girls to be their best selves. We
are fighting the good fight for our children in hopes and knowing that the victory has already
been won and that is Jesus.
Every day is a learning experience in parenting, and I am so honored
that my husband and I have been given the privilege to raise four children. “I have fought the
good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith” (English Standard Version, 2 Timothy
4:7).
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References
Dobson, J. C. (2014). Bringing Up Girls. Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
https://libertyonline.vitalsource.com/books/9781414348445
Esv.org
. ESV Bible. (n.d.-a). https://www.esv.org/