Chapter 25
Holden tries to get some sleep at Grand Central Station. However, he is too depressed to fall asleep, and his discomfort worsens as commuters start streaming in. He wonders if he might have overreacted to Mr. Antolini’s gesture. The thought that Mr. Antolini’s gesture might have been an act of kindness makes him even more depressed. He walks out of Grand Central and tries to eat something, but is unable to. He reaches Fifth Avenue and thinks of the time when he had taken Phoebe Christmas shopping along the avenue.
Holden is filled with dread every time he tries to cross the road. He feels he might not reach the other side of the road and implores Allie to protect him. In a way, this struggle is metaphorical, as it reflects the deep anguish and confusion in Holden’s heart.
Holden walks around a lot and starts sweating. He sits on a bench and thinks of what he could do next. He decides to visit Phoebe at her school and tell her about his plan to head West. He imagines staying in a cabin, marrying a deaf and mute woman, and having kids. His dubious attitude toward women is once again evident in his desire to marry someone deaf and mute. At Phoebe’s school, he buys some stationery and writes her a note, telling her to meet him at the Museum of Art during her lunch hour. In the note he also mentions his plan to leave New York and travel West. He hands over the note to an administrative staff at the principal’s office, asking him to give it to Phoebe. He notices that someone has scribbled “Fuck You” on a wall. Enraged that someone could write such obscenities in a school, he rubs it off the wall. Though this mirrors his desire to protect the innocence of children, it is in stark contrast to the way he speaks. Throughout the novel, Holden utters many obscenities.
At the museum, Holden meets a group of boys and leads them to the mummies section. Just as he is enjoying himself, he comes across another “Fuck You” scribbled under the glass, which makes him feel more depressed. He goes to the washroom and passes out. When he wakes up, he is thankful to not have banged his head against any object or structure.
Phoebe is late, but she arrives with a suitcase and informs Holden that she has decided to travel West with him. By doing so, Phoebe forces Holden to act more responsibly. He urges her to reconsider and leaves her suitcase at the museum’s coat-check. Phoebe walks off, but instead of chasing her, Holden simply walks in another direction, knowing that she will eventually follow. When she does, Holden leads her to the zoo and convinces her that he is not going to travel West.
Holden takes her to the same carousel he, D.B., and Allie used to take her to. As she rides the carousel, Holden is worried that she might fall, as she keeps trying to touch the golden ring hanging from the ceiling. However, he decides it is better to let her fall than interfere. This is in stark contrast to his desire to become a catcher in the rye in order to prevent children from falling off the precipice. By now, Holden likely realizes that Phoebe is not going to be innocent forever; his holding back could be seen as his coming to terms with this inevitability. He assures Phoebe that she can go for a second ride and promises that he would go back home with her after the ride, and not head West. Phoebe is happy to hear this, and as Holden watches her ride the carousel, his heart is full of happiness, a feeling that has eluded him so far.